MASCULINE / FEMININE ENERGY

The beards, the leather, the attitude, the persona: It is what leather, kink and fetish thrives on in the gay kink world. 

The butch, in your face, don't take no shit Leather Daddies and the macho but highly submissive Leather boys creates a masculine energy so thick you can almost cut it with a knife. 

Even in 2024 I constantly read online profiles in which the poster will describe that he is masculine or that he is looking for masculine men. 

I cannot count how much I am complimented on how masculine my presence is.  Having someone acknowledge your masculinity is very much a compliment and a high regard for most.

But what about when someone notices the softer aspects of a man?  Beyond that, dare I say his feminine traits?

From childhood all the way into my current adult life, I have always had a very soft spoken voice and though the tone has dropped a bit, it has never had much bass to it.

Often in the past I have used a lower range when talking which never really worked because eventually the real voice would come out after getting relaxed enough in a conversation.

I used to get teased about it, not in a malicious way but more in friendly joking.  But it did nevertheless leave negative feelings about how I should sound.

I have often heard, "You don’t sound the way you look." 

 PAPA is a perfect example of how people expect to hear one voice from me and get the total other end of the spectrum.

The gentle nature and personality I possess would often leave some confused by the overtly virile images seen in my pictures.  But that is who I am.

A soft mushy marshmallow with awkward nerdish tendencies that happen to love to dominate and annihilate men’s buttholes.

But it goes beyond my personality, my voice and my style of fashion.  It is having the freedom to expess that fem side just as much as the masc. 

My very first experience seeing a guy  bending the gender rules was when I first started cruising. 

I was down by the cursing spot by the levee.  This brute masculine and quite handsome guy came driving up in his white pick up truck.  Built like a fucking brick house with a tank top barely able to support his chest.  The nipples alone were doing damage to the poor shirt.  Needless to say my mouth was watering. 

And then he stepped out of the car.

From the waist down he had fishnet stockings, black high heels, and a black mini skirt.

I nearly lost my shit from the shock and from laughing so hard.  Twenty years later, I'm fucking guys in lace lingerie demanding them to give me their "pussy."

Never would I have imagined using either "lingerie" nor "pussy" in any sentence to illustrate some of the things that gets me off.  But here we are.

I am flattered by the celebration of my masculinity from others.  But there is a ridiculous ratio of Bitch as well as Butch that makes me, me. 

And though I don't bring it out much, She's in there. 

I believe what has allowed me to be so open with fluidity is the rebellious nature of doing what one would swear I have no damn business doing.  It is in itself the challenge of "Oh yes the fuck I can," and being totally exasperated of what the gay "community's" ideal of what a sexy man looks like.

Although men in lace lingerie gets my dick throbbing, I never really got on board with the fully aspect of cross dressing. 

The make up, wigs and bra has never really turned me on.  I'm am not quite sure if it is the old, "If I wanted to be with a woman I would have one" saying that is so popular in the gay circles or if it's they way these dudes put on the makeup.  Some of the guys really need to tighten up their game in my humble opinion.

I think for me, the blend of the masculine and feminine in certain ways it is presented, can be sexy as hell.   And just because I don't get into the full get up, doesn't negate the fact that someone else does.

As for myself, I have gone full drag a few times just for kicks and to experiment.  I must say that full fem ain't me!  But there are norms that I definitely enjoy breaking just to switch it the fuck up some time. 

I love masculinity.  It is just a part of who I am.  But let my ass see some pink thongs and pink undies. Then, Bitch it on!