NOT AS BAD AS EXPECTED

 Friday 27, 2026

The conversation with the narcissist went better than I expected.  Yeah I got the "You need to be more responsible with your father's affairs" talk.  

I didn't refute.  I simply acknowledged my mistake, explained why it happened and gave my plan on how to rectify the situation.  The situation was handled.  The person was happy, I can go on about my day, all is right for now.

I acknowledged my mistake. Made a plan to fix it and a whole nasty conversation was avoided.  

I know when I am wrong and don't have a problem admitting it.  I'm also learning that I don't need nor should I go any further than that.  The less I try to justify, defend and share my point of view the less ammunition it gives this person.  I don't try any more. I don't need to.  When I am wrong I will acknowledge it, fix it and move on.  

KEEP IT MOVING

 I am sure I'm going to hear a mouthful from the narcissist tomorrow.  I made a rather big mistake with my dad’s funds.  It is not so bad that it is beyond repair but it will entail me making some financial arrangements to get back on track.  

There is a part of me that feels like crawling under a rock.  Friday is going to be stressful enough as I am going to have to communicate my mistake to this person.  They actually wanted answers today but I just wasn't available nor emotionally ready to deal with this person.

Although I felt a little anxious today, I reminded myself that no matter what is said, we all make mistakes.

 I've made them.  The narcissist has made them.  Even beyond that, whatever this person has to say to me really doesn't matter anymore because I have officially checked out from this person.

The only reason we communicate is because of my dad.  So I'm going to get this conversation over and go on about my day.

As of now I am going to get in the shower, go to bed and wake up refreshed ready to take on whatever comes my way.

IT'S THE APPROACH

January 17, 2026

I recently received a message on Fet going into a BBC fantasy, and I'm not talking about the news. At best BBC makes me cringe when referring to me. I found myself so perturbed by the message. That is when I responded politely stating that BBC fantasy is not my thing (no pun intended, but I did just hear that) as well as some other things in our conversation and thanked him for understanding.

More times than not I would get a snarky remark or a block altogether.  What this gentleman did was something that shock me instantly.

He said, "Okay thank you."

What I learned from this is that people will often do or say something on these platforms that throws others off. But instead of flying off the handle or going on a moral preaching point, sometimes all that is needed is to calmly let a person know where you stand without feeling like you must "give them a piece of your mind."

In the same respect when addressing others in DMs we may first want to introduce ourselves and read the room before we decide to get explicit with our conversations.

I don't know if this gentleman still follows me, but if he does I would like to think we have a deeper respect for one another because of communication.

CREPES AND POTATOES

LINK: LOGAN ARROW

February 20, 2026

"Wake up sleepy head."

I wasn't quite sure if Logan was awake but I thought I would give it a shot.  Unsure we he would be headed for the train I messaged him as soon as I was done helping Boss with his morning routine.  The goal was to meet him at the hotel room but I was a little later than I expected.  He was already walking on G street toward the train station.

I saw him walking and picked him up.  He was due for I believe 12:53pm but 12:45pm was boarding.  

That gave us plenty enough time for brunch.  There's a restaurant that specializes in crepes.  I have been trying for months to take him there.  I never could get there on time taking that their hours closed by 3pm.  Finally this would be the opportunity for him to try it out. 

Plate cleaned.

I think he liked it. This is one of the rare moments when I introduce him to something new.  He usually has the one with all the dining smarts.  I'm glad he enjoyed it.  Hopefully I can visit him in Arcata some time.  The chances may be very slim with my responsibilities but I've learned to never say never.

LATE

LINK: LOGAN ARROW

 February 19, 2026

Usually when I'm late for anything, there is a good reason for it.  If I am not taking care of business for my dad, I'm helping Boss out with something.  

Today I messaged Logan letting him know I would be available around 1:30pm.  Yes I did my usual routine with Boss to make sure he was set for the day. Yes I took care of some business regarding my dad.  The time I took cutting my hair and shaving should have been last priority.

I like both looks.  I like the hairy bearded mountain man look.  After a while it gets old.  It is time to enjoy the semi clean shaven to clean shaven version of me. 

I don't like keeping the same look all the time.  It drives me crazy.  It is more than the "look." It is where my mind is. The journey I am on at the time.  I cannot tell you how many Black men and women with beautiful locs I have complimented and admired in just the last week. There's even a White guy at the grocery store with them. Not bad but definitely not as strategically sectioned and twisted.

Yes. I am pretty sure I will start that journey again. But for now I have to get all this shit off me!

It wouldn't have been so bad if I would have cut my hair earlier in the morning.  But as usual I have my routine with Boss.  It is already 1:15pm.  

"I am getting ready to cut my hair and shave. I will meet you around 2pm," I message him.

I finish up and know for certain I have to take a shower. Yesterday's funk is burning my nostril hairs.  This heat gives no leeway for going a day without washing these pits.  Let's not even get on the man bush and funky butt.  Yes it is close to 2pm already. 

Logan was with a friend that I really wanted to meet.  They waited.  I didn't get there until 2:30pm.

They had been in Old Sac since about 1:15pm.  I missed out on meeting his friend.  

Although Logan didn't make much of a deal out of it, I couldn't help but think he was disappointed.  I was disappointed in myself.  

He did seem a little less energetic as usual.  I couldn't help but to think that is my tardiness.  "I'm sure he is tired of me always pushing things back.  Usually my reasoning is valid.  But today it's because I wanted to cut my hair?

We did check out a new bowling alley/arcade close by.  They didn't have the much there that caught either of our attention.  But I do order a burger and fries that's to die for.  Delicious in every kind of way imaginable. 

We did chat for a while. I could have totally misread his body language.  Maybe he was genuinely tired from the night prior and just needed a nap.  Maybe he was a bit disappointed that I missed out on the opportunity to meet his friend.  And then it could have been a little of both.  I do know this 90 degree heat drains the hell out of me.  This is just March.  We haven't reached the triple digits yet.

I am not sure what tomorrow will bring. I do know he will be leaving.  Hopefully I can catch him just long enough to do something with him tomorrow.

TODAY’S PICK: HOUSEWARMING OR DEFILING THE BED

 LINKS: TODAY’S PICK

               LOGAN ARROW    

March 16, 2026

I finished up reading Logan’s latest post HOUSEWARMING OR DEFILING THE BED. It's not the first or the third Time I've read the entry. I just happened to enjoy that post very much. It's kind of like how I enjoy reruns.  I know what’s going to happen next. It doesn’t make it any less entertaining.

I know for certain it is a much lighter version of himself than the one that often carries the weight of the world on his shoulders. 

I think I like it also because it provides a small glimpse into the dynamic of his home life with his roommates.

Speaking of which, I got a preview video clip of what his room looks like.  Very roomy. It has been described in a few conversations at least how I interpret it as not... Hell, I don't know how to describe it. But seeing it with my own eyes, it feels like a room I would be proud to call home. Some people go for a bunch of furniture and tables, blah blah, blah. I am a man that enjoys minimalist  value.

I am sure we will have plenty to talk about as Mr. Arrow will be in the Sac O Tomatoes tomorrow.  I just know some uptight Sacramentan would be steaming if they heard that term. I said what I said.

As for the title Housewarming or Defiling the Bed.  Why not both?

TODAY’S PICK: THE DIRTY JOCK

 LINK: TODAY’S PICK

It started out as a journal of breaking in a fresh new jockstrap into a well used object of release. It would also showcase me in various styles of underwear as I explored my underwear fetish.

I’m back at it on THE DIRTY JOCK. Check it out throughout the day as I will be posting new material as well as some old favorites.