Being the youngest of the family and being the youngest of my friends (at least most of them) is becoming more heartbreaking as I get older.
Sometimes, I see their aging process and vulnerability, which makes me sad. It makes me look at my aging process and increasing vulnerabilities.
Ironically when I was younger I often looked forward to my golden years. I admired (and still do ) those wiser and those who have experiences that they love to share with others. Maybe some of my love for sharing my experiences, whether they involve my kink journey or life in general, derives from the inspiration of my more seasoned peers as they share their experiences.
In my twenties and thirties, I had a difficult time relating to those in my same age bracket. It just didn't fit me. Now that I am currently fifty four, I can relate to people my age. However I have grandfathered in,(no pun intended) a dynamic where most of my associates are at least ten, fifteen, sometimes twenty or more years older than me.
When I met my husband I was thirty two and he was fifty one. It didn't seem like a big gap at the time. And for us it still isn't. But time is definitely starting to limit certain things we can do and certain places we can go and everything going on with my dad just have me in a melancholy place.
It doesn't last very long. It comes and goes. But it is in no doubt, there.
The sands of time....Time marching on.... as we see ourselves and the people surrounding us growing older every day. How can the years be flying by as they do?! Reflecting on this journey we call our life and questioning all the decisions that have brought us to this place. In one way or another it leaves us all with a sense of melancholy. But today is a new day and all that really matters is what we do and how we live our life from this day forward. Grab life by the balls and go for it!!!!
ReplyDeleteJust what I needed as always. Thank you for your constant encouragement. 🤗
Deleteit felt amazing to read this.
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