SO, THIS IS HOW MY DAY WENT

 First and foremost, let me start by saying that if anyone is commenting on my posts and are not seeing the comments, you can always try again but most likely the comment went to spam. I will attempt to check my spam at least one to two times a day just to make sure.  So if your message doesn't post, most likely I will find it in the spam and post it. I actually got comments that were already posted go into spam and I had to re post them. Welcome to wonderful customer service! 🤦🏾‍♂️

May 28, 2024

         Tuesday

         3:16pm

            

So this is how my day went.

To be continued

            ?

KINK TEST

Not sure how kinky or non kinky this makes me.  But an inquiring reader, Gary M, wanted to know.  It's kind of interesting reading 60% Switch.  

Although physically I'm not there yet, I do entertain the thought of bottoming more; however with very little to no desire to be submissive. Unless he is totally good at getting me in that headspace.

Age Player kinda surprised me.  Now looking at it the Daddy / boy dynamic does often put us both in different age headspaces.  

Well this is me! LOL

 == Results from bdsmtest.org == 

96% Dominant 

95% Primal (Hunter) 

94% Rigger 

84% Voyeur 

75% Non-monogamist 

63% Sadist 

60% Switch 

59% Daddy/Mommy 

57% Exhibitionist 

56% Primal (Prey) 

49% Master/Mistress 

49% Owner 

39% Vanilla 

37% Ageplayer 

36% Experimentalist 

28% Brat tamer 

28% Degrader 

24% Submissive 

21% Pet 

14% Masochist 

13% Rope bunny 

0% Brat 

0% Degradee 

0% Boy/Girl 

0% Slave 

ZERO'S ABC TRAINING

 January 7, 2023

             Saturday

           12:14 PM

       Link: ZERO

I placed six hankies on the bed; various colors from the hanky code. We went over what each color represented. Usually I would put the hanky that I am going to participate in that play on. I picked the pink hanky believing that we would get into some toy play. However, I decided on another plan which would test his oral skills.

"How well do you think you know your ABCs?"

"I think I know them Sir," He responded.

"Are you sure?"

"I think so Sir."

"Let me here them."

He began,"A, B, C, D, E, F, G..."

"Stop," I interrupted.

"How well do you know them?"

"I think I know them well Sir."

"You think you can say them pretty well?"

"I think I can say them all Sir," Zero replied confidently.

I placed the tip of my index finder in his mouth.

"Go."

He began to run through the ABCs like he was in a race.

"A, B, C, D, E..."

"Stop."

I placed a few more fingers in his mouth only as far as the tips.

"You're sure about that?" I asked.

"I think so Sir."

"Start."

Again he blurted out the letters,"A, B,C, D, E, F, G, H, I..."

"Stop," I interrupted.

I placed my fingers deeper in his mouth. There was definitely a change in his speech but nothing that would be considered a challenge.

We played this game for quite some time, each time turning up the intensity. 

Each time I prompted him to slow down.

"This time I want you to go from A to Z.”

“Okay,” he nodded.

“But this time,” I said, “I want you to go slower.”

“Okay.”

“Start.”

He slowed down and began to take his time.

“A, B, C…”

“Good boy,” I Interrupted.

“D, E, F, G, …”

I gently stroked his beard as I prepared to probe his mouth again with my fingers. I went deeper and deeper challenging both his speech and gag abilities.

At the end of each round Zero would take deep breaths to regroup. I would push deeper with each round pushing him deeper into challenging territory.

“Good boy. You’re such a fucking good boy.”

“Thank you,” he said as he panted heavily.

We’re going to do that one more time,” I said.

“Okay Dad,” he said catching his breath.

“I think I can.” 

“You can. I know you can.” I declared.

I gently tugged on his beard and prompted him.

“Slow. Take your time. Go.”

“A.”

There was about a two second pause.

“B.”

Again, there was a pause.

“C…”

He got to the letter “G” and I unbuttoned my pants and pulled out my hard cock.

“H”

(pause)

“I”

(pause)

“J”

I pushed his head down to enter his mouth.

“K,” he began to slur.

He pushed through to the last letter.  

"Good boy!" I praised as I kissed his forehead.

"Thank you Daddy," he said catching his breath.

"You made me very proud.  But most of all you should be proud of yourself."

"Thank you Daddy."

As a reward I asked him what he would like.

"Daddy I want your dick."

"You want my dick?"

"I want your dick," he repeated.

"Can you say it a little bit louder?"

"I want your dick Daddy!" He shouted.

"Daddy I want your dick. I need it in my mouth!"

He repeated, "I need it."

I put it in him and started to pump.

"You want me to fuck your face?"

I pumped and pumped and he enjoyed every inch.

SHEATH AND STRAP

Cock sheath and jockstrap.

Fun to stroke in but have yet to stretch a hole with.

Any takers?

                               

THE BATTLE STILL RAGES

Originally posted on my previous blog

 January 26, 2022

12:12am

I had this post in the queue since January.  I debated  posting this because, well, who wants to be vulnerable?   I feel like the pressure is more intense for a Dom because the image portrayed is that the DOM is always in control.  No one knows what he’s really feeling because it is not cool to open up.  Especially,  never show your weakness in front of a sub. How would you ever gain his respect?  I battled all this and came to the conclusion that this journal is to let the world know that I don’t always have my shit together nor do I have to.  Also anyone who loses respect for me for showing that I am human is not worthy of my time anyway.

To all novice Tops, Daddies, Masters etc. It is okay not to have your shit together. You will constantly wonder how you “measure up” or feel like you could never measure up with all these perfect superior “Alphas” because all you see is what they will allow.  Yes I battled whether I was going to keep it real or not. But I’m glad I did. Hopefully this will help others dealing with similar issues.    

It’s twelve twelve in the midnight morning.  I have 48 minutes to contemplate going to Burger King and getting a chicken sandwich. 

I’m not even hungry.  My mouth is salivating for a fucking chicken sandwich that I desperately want but will be totally stuffed if I eat it.  So why do I want it?  

Maybe it’s  depression.  Maybe it’s boredom.  Maybe I’m what is known as an emotional eater.  I just know that food has sometimes been my friend and my worst enemy.  I am at my highest weight in my life right now, I feel so out of control.  It has been months since I’ve picked up my camera and shot self portraits. 

That is something I used to do when I felt sexy enough to post thotty thirst traps online.  I am not even going to deny being a big attention whore when the mood is right.  But as of late my main focus has been to be as low key as possible. 

We are told to love ourselves and “body positivity” this and “body positivity” that, which is utter bullshit because at the end of the day all that ever floods my social media feeds are skinny or majorly buff White guys screaming “body positivity.” I say fuck body positivity!  I don’t love what I’ve become because it is not natural for me. 

And no.  This attitude has nothing to do with the false narrative of “loving yourself” regardless of social media explicitly ignoring races and body types that look like me.  (shame on you, you know who you are.) 

No. It has to do with me getting out of this funk I’ve gotten into over the last few years.

Before my injury I could walk long walks, jog, and exercise.  Staying fit was much easier but now I have been limited to what I can do.  

I lost 30 fucking pounds in 2020.  After I had my surgery for my hernia I discovered that they did not properly fix it.  Those sons of bitches told me I have to have surgery again.  I literally cried like a baby.  I also decided not to let them touch me with a ten foot pole ever again.

During 2021 I just fucking ate myself to oblivion. The 30 pounds I lost in 2020? I gained 40 in 2021.

And here I am.  I can’t say I’m feeling sorry for myself.  But I did get very angry and adopted an “I don’t give a fuck.  I’m going to eat what I fucking want when I fucking want it,” attitude.

Now I feel like shit.  Now I look like shit.

I’m angry and I am tired of waiting to find a competent doctor to fix my hernia.  If I could cut myself open and place the bulge back in my body and staple the tissue so that it’s not recurrent I would.  But how realistic is that?

Needless to say I’m mad.  I’m depressed at the situation.  But I can’t eat myself to an early grave. 

I’m not going to love me the way I am or accept me for the way I am because where I am is not healthy for me physically and definitely not psychologically. 

I’m going to change my eating habits. I did it once I can do it again.  I guess it starts at 12:35 am by staying my fat ass home.

Reading this back, sounds like I was in a pretty low place. Actually although I did have my moans and groans it was what sparked my fitness journey. I have gone up, down to back up in my weight but I am not fretting because my 2020 experience showed me that I can do it. I did it once and I will do it again. 

One last note:

The original title of this post was “Body Positivity My Ass!” I decided to change the title because I don't want anyone who is comfortable with their bodies and weight to assume I am calling them out. I am specifically referring to my own walk and my own journey.  However, I say WITH MY WHOLE CHEST, to those bitches who scream about body positivity but only post one specific body type AND race, shame on you! 

I said what I said.

THE AGGRESSIVE ASIAN GUY

       Photo taken Monday, April 29, 2024

You may be wondering what you are looking at.  At a glance, it seems like nothing more than a few business buildings next to a field.

Today that is exactly what it is. However, before that red bob wire fence was put up to keep people out, that area served another purpose unknown to many.

Yes, there was always the red fence to the left and right that you can barely see in the picture.  But the front fence was not there. That area was open. 

Though there was a good amount of bushes in that territory, it was effortless to walk through, unlike how it is currently in the picture.

The fence on the left and right curves into a backward c shape, making what once was a walkway that leads towards the back of the warehouse. 

This area is located by a levee. This levee was once very popular as a cruise spot. Dozens of guys would venture down into the bushes, down long trails, and into hidden pockets of shrubbery to play around.

This area has very little traffic. The levee was the place that was poppin’. Many didn't care to hike further than what was available or never paid much attention. (Perfect for privacy.) For years, I walked past it, not realizing its usage until one day, I met The Aggressive Asian Guy.

Sometime In the Spring of 2004

Around the same time this picture was taken at 4:30 pm

It's a warm spring day. It is warm enough to build a slight sweat from hiking up and down the levee. But it is not too uncomfortable. 

Surprisingly, I am doing perfectly fine with not having allergies, especially being in the grassy areas as I am. 

A walk down the trail towards the river, a thirty-something-year-old Black guy looks at me. I look at him. He walks past me. I turn around and follow. He leads me behind a tree.  Before he even reaches into his pants, a White man, maybe in his fifties, walks in our general direction and stops. He looks at us and begins to reach into his pants. Within seconds, the Black guy walks toward the White dad type like I wasn’t even there.

Stupidly, I follow suit, thinking we could get into a three-way. I’m shooed off like I’m some fucking mosquito.  How soon they turn when they feel something better comes their way.

Later, I run into a White guy clean shaven probably

in his forties. We find a secluded area. He gets down on his knees and begins to blow me. His mouth feels terrific. He opens wide and massages as much of my ball sac as he can with his tongue while deep stroking me with his mouth. Many guys either don't have that talent or don't consider details like that.  He is very talented. He blows me for a few minutes before he bolts. He hears another guy coming, which scares him.  I pull my pants up and wait to see who’s coming up. It’s the White Dad type.  I give him a nod and a hello greeting.  He walks past me (again, like I was invisible.) I chuckle as he walks by in all his “glory.”

At this point, I bust up laughing. Some of these gay queens are so elitist it’s comical. 

I trail towards the levee when I see a young Asian guy walking my way. He looks at me.  I look at him. He turns and walks out of the lower part of the levee where all the other cruising guys are. Unsure if he is leaving or has lost interest, I roam a bit down in the area of the other cruisers. 

After a few minutes I see the Asian guy again. 

He is a handsome guy. He is maybe in his late twenties or early thirties. He is about my height (5’10”), and he is clean-shaven with a thin build. However, he has a nice set of shoulders and arms, letting me know he works out.

He is wearing a dark blue baseball cap, a long-sleeved sports shirt, and a loose-fitting pair of faded jeans. 

He walks past me.  I look at him and smile. He doesn't say anything. As he passes by, he stares at me from the corner of his eyes. I take that as my cue to follow him.  

He walks up the trail to the top of the levee. On the other side is the area that is pictured above. The layout is the same except for the fence. We are talking twenty years since this took place. There is a pathway that is easy to walk. Even though there aren’t wild bushes down this path like in the photo, plenty of shrubbery grows against the fence, and shade from the leaves provides excellent privacy. As I follow him around the backward C-shaped trail, he continues to look back to make sure I’m following him.

We finally get to the back of the warehouse building.

“You know, I've never been back here before.”

The aggressive Asian says nothing.

“So what do…”

Before I could finish ask what he’s into he pushes my head down and buries my face in his crotch. 

Click here to continue reading

🔽

THE INTERROGAYTION

                       May 4, 2024 

          

                            Saturday 

                    About 2:30pm

 Link:INTERROGAYTION

We’re setting up the club for the event. There are about 8 beds that are moved into the main area. We spend a good amount of time setting up lights and props for the prison-themed sex event. I must admit at first I have my reservations about attending an event with such a theme. The home page of the website has a fantasy synopsis that takes place in 2216. I honestly am not keen on the idea of the synopsis. Altogether, the event is not as callous or tone def as I thought the concept would be. 

About 3:40pm

The main coordinator gathers all of the workers together for our orientation. We are in orientation from about 3:40pm to a few minutes before 6:00pm.

One of the reasons I would highly recommend any Horse Market and / or Interrogaytion event put on by Matt or Martin is because they are serious about making sure the bottoms feel safe and that everyone is having a good time.  The orientation alone was enough to let me know that these guys are the real deal. Yes it was a long ass orientation but it is definitely worth it, to make sure everyone is safe and is having fun.

Before I go any further let me explain Interrogaytion.

Just like the Horse Market, the tops are separated from the bottoms which means the bottoms enter from one entrance and the tops from another. 

Since the event is a prison theme, the tops are called guards and the bottoms are called inmates. The volunteer workers are called deputies which is my role.  There are two Marshalls that are in charge of cell block FF (the fisting area) to make sure the players were matched up according to there skill level. Last but not least, is the maintenance crew. They have one job which is to serve as fluffers for the gaurds. They do not get fucked but they can suck and do anything else to get the guard up.

6:00pm 

Everyone takes their position. I’m at the door, taking the inmates’tickets. 

7:00pm 

I close the door for the inmates. After 7pm anyone that arrives later will enter through the main entrance.

|

The deputies are hooding the inmates with their selected hoods. The white hood means condoms only. The black hood means bare or condoms. The red is designated for the maintenance crew (fluffers.)

When the last inmate is hooded, one of the deputies calls it out and the guards are released. 

It is definitely a sight to see all those horny guards going after the horny holes. 

Just like in HM, once the tops are released, it's like a herd charging on the floor.  It is definitely like no other sex event. There is no standing around cruising each other. There are no eye rolls, dirty looks, standing around modeling or overall discrimination and attitude that comes with your basic sex party because the mares are hooded. The inmates cannot see who is fucking them and the guards doesn't see what the inmates look like.

The Stallions / Gaurds came to fuck, and the Mares / Inmates are their to be used. 

FREEBALLIN’

 May 6, 2024

       Monday 

I just discovered that one of the maintenance men, a thirty-something Latino with dark brown skin, short wavy hair, and a sexy Spanish accent, wears no underwear.

*Currently running around the apartment trying to see what else I can get him over to fix.* 🤭

A STABLE HAND’S PERSPECTIVE

May 3, 2004

Friday

Link: HORSE MARKET

Last night was fun y’all. I got to work as a Stable Hand.  It was so cool watching all of the Stallions and Mares having a good time.  We had one white hood that was hot as hell getting railed by plenty. 

For those that are unfamiliar, Horse Market is an all male and male identifying sex event.  

The group divides the Tops (called Stallions) from the Bottoms (called Mares) until it’s time for the party. The Mares are hooded and never see the Stallions. Mares with white hoods only get fucked (mounted) with condoms while those with a red hood was fair game for all.  Check out my post, MY FIRST HORSE MARKET.

The moans, the screams of pleasure, and those rock hard stallions was a very hot environment to be in. I’m so glad I got to experience the other side of HM.

 Working as a Stable Hand definitely has it’s benefits as it was a pleasure assisting the mares with their needs. They were more than appreciative. 

Because the mares couldn’t see, the Stable Hands (assistants) were there eyes. Whenever they raised their hand for anything, we would help. 

There were specific protocols how to properly guide the mares to the restroom or another location. Making sure the mares don't trip or run into anything, we were trained to stand the mares up, get in front of them with them behind us. They were to place their arms around our sloulders and move in as close to our backsides as possible. Then we were to inform them that we were going to reach behind and grab each butt cheek. A left hand squeeze to turn left and a right hand squeeze to turn right.

 I definitely got thoroughly turned on moving the mares as I guided them with their bulges pressing into me while I grabbed their asses to lead them. 🤭

Every stallion there was very helpful and considerate of the mares safety and boundaries. 

We did get breaks in which we would take off our uniform and get to play either as a mare or a stallion. 

I would definitely volunteer again as a Stable Hand. I really had a great time last night.

Tonight, Saturday,  is The InterroGAYtion. It is a prison-themed sex party put on by the Stable Wrangler of the Horse Market. I will keep you posted.