November 6, 2023
There were no rings.
There were no fancy traditions.
Other than my mom as a witness, there were no guests.
Both my partner of 20 years and I are not big on ceremonies or tradition.
I called my dad and my sister literally like two days before to let them know that we were going up to the county clerk to get our marriage license. I planned it that way so that no one would make any unnecessary changes to their schedule with my sister being busy and my dad having a change in his health.
Neither one of us wanted to make a big fuss. There was no exchanging of rings. We both hate jewelry. But two things I am glad we decided to do:
I'm glad we decided to be sworn in the ceremonial room and I am glad we decided to have our vows recited. We didn't write our own we recited what they had.
Although it wasn't going to be a big deal, when I looked into my partner now husband's eyes to say our vows I could not help the overwhelming emotions welling up.
For the first time I understood how much he loves me.
There are things that he says to me that are very hurtful. There are times when I totally shut down and will literally walk away from him mid sentence. But I understand that these are things that we will continue to deal with.
I'm just very grateful to find some who loves and cares for me the way he does. And yes, he has expressed that to me many times over the years. It was just most evident at that moment when I saw his face and the look in his eyes.
And so yet another wonderful journey begins.
This is awesome. Simple and sincere. All the hoopla and wedding formalities are meaningless. Just two people choosing to care and support each other...... to face this thing we call life together through the good times and the bad.
ReplyDeleteCongratulations to you both.
Thank you Gary. I very much appreciate it. Hoopla : The exact words I used to one of my friends about all the preparations etc. Don't get me wrong that can be a beautiful thing for those who enjoy it. But what I learned through therapy, is: Marriage doesn't have to be a one size fits all type of suite. It was so elementary How it was explained and yet such a hard concept to grasp growing up. My therapist helped me to understand that we can make our own rules, have our own way to express our love. It really was an eye opening experience. The idea of monogamy, rings and vows are all just rules and traditions a template. We can make our own rules and template and it can be change as needed to fit our needs. Wow! I didn't know I was going to write an essay. LOL I guess for the first time the promise of commitment isn't as scary now that we understand it doesn't have to be on any other person's terms other than our own.
DeleteYou've expressed it perfectly..
ReplyDeleteI very much appreciate that.
DeleteCongratulations! This is the best news I've read today!!
ReplyDeleteThank you. It has been a long road. but we did it !
DeleteThis brought a tear of joy to my eye. Congratulations.
ReplyDeleteWow! Thank you. I appreciate your support!
DeleteCongrats, Daddy! I wish you all the best!!! 🥰
ReplyDeleteWow! That's great! Congratulations to you both!
ReplyDelete