January 22, 2023
Sunday
3:08 am
Hours after My First HorseMarket Event; Ironically the night that I went as a stallion; I masturbated thinking of getting fucked. I went home horny mainly to entertain myself by fingering my hole and jacking till I came.
It’s been ten years since I’ve been fucked. I hardly ever even play with my hole. It’s like that part is closed for good…..???
Early Sunday morning in the hotel, I had my leather gloves on. I was stroking my dick with my legs wide open,watching myself as I filmed. I had my cock ring nearby so I put it on. I got it as tight as I could. The cock ring had me so horny as all the blood was tightly giving my dick attention.
For some reason I lubed up my hole real good and pushed against my walls until I got just the tip of my middle finger in. I kept pushing against the inside of that wall. Not necessarily going deeper but pressing against it.
It had been so long since my walls felt anything pressed against it like that.
I definitely shot my load.
(See video below)
I thought about that moment and realized, I want to be fucked.
I want to be fucked.
Not dominated.
Not pounded out of my gourd; nor do I want some asshat pushing my back down telling me, “Arch your back! Stop running!”
I don’t want to be assaulted.
I don’t want to be subservient (unless he has the erotic energy to take me there.)
I want to be fucked.
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This would take someone with patience especially if I’m “tip of a finger” tight.
Someone not too big. But big enough to give me that deer in the headlights glare upon entry.
Last, I want someone who is okay with using a condom.
Basically I want to be fucked by someone as rare as a unicorn. Actually I’d probably have more luck finding a unicorn.
I’m not “looking” for this guy.
I don’t “need” this to happen.
I want it to happen.
But until it does; No.
If it does or not;
I’m going to continue to “Daddy” the fuck out of these boys and carry on with the The Making Of Daddy Scruff
I'm a firm believer of always keeping my options open when approaching an encounter. The chemistry...the dynamics all come into play. I have a friend who is a total alpha daddy 99% of the time. But then there's that 1%, and the right circumstances and person suddenly brings about an entirely different scenario. He can let go of all his preconceived notions and literally become a different person without any regrets or damage to his alpha persona. It's part of who he is and he accepts it.
ReplyDeleteYess Indeed! I have let go of those "Have to be one or the other" notions a long time ago. Just like you mentioned, be secure and let go without regrets and or damage to one's persona. It would be interesting how it would play out however, taking it's been a 10 years. actually a little over 10. It would definitely take someone with patience. One of the reasons I stopped being versatile to begin with. I know there are plenty of guys out there with that touch but finding them is a bit tricky. But we'll see what happens.
DeleteGood luck with that search...but, you never know. Good guys are out there...
ReplyDeleteYes, I'm sure they're out there. It is not much of a search. But if it happens it happens. I'm pretty content where I am but again, maybe someday.
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