Links: THE INITIATION
The year 2002 - Present
I am Mark.
I have been for quite some time.
Birth and legal names hold no relevance here.
Every name on this blog whether given by birth, nick name, or by character description serves a purpose of bringing each person to his own unique existence.
Although I am indeed Mark, there is another Mark whose DNA lives inside me.
This DNA belongs to the man that initiated me into the world of kink and BDSM. He is the man who dug deep into my insides and ran them inside out. He is the man that I would refer to as SIR.
Some time in 2002.
At a local gay bar
Saturday about 1:00am
It was about 1:00am in the morning. I was out at the local gay dive bar. I've been out for some time that night cruising.
For me at the time, being gay was more about finding ass and dick than anything.
Although I did have a few gay friends from the Gay men's support group I was a part of, I was more about being on the prowl when I went out. I am way freer to be a ho solo.
I was getting out of one way of life and finding out how to live my life in my new one. Spending years in the church was a great experience for me in many ways and yet also it caused many personal and spiritual struggles that I sometimes still deal with today.
I'm not a big alcohol drinker. I never have been. I was not going out with any friends. I chose it that way when I was horny and out on the prowl.
It was late and I was bored. I decided that I would buy one more soft drink and call this Saturday night a wrap.
I ordered one more Sprite.
I migrated to another open table as the previous one was taken. Across from me was a very handsome Latino man. He had short dark wavy hair, olive brown skin and a thin goatee.
We exchange eye contact for awhile.
After a few minutes he walked to my table and asked to have a seat.
We introduced ourselves. We are both Mark. We laughed at the introduction.
"Nice to meet you Mark," he laughed.
"Nice to meet you Mark," I replied with a giggle.
I don't remember much about what we chatted about. But I do know that he was interested in bringing me home and I was interested in going with him.
"So what are you? Top? Bottom? Versatile?"
"I am a versatile top but I am more of a top," I replied.
"And yourself?" I asked.
"I'm a total top." Mark replied.
"Total top?"
"Yes." He responded.
Usually I end up topping even other tops or we end up flipping. Because of this, I assume that at some point I will get to top him.
As we continued to get to know each other's preferences, He made it most definitely clear that he is a total top and that he was going to top me if I came to his place. Although I am a versatile guy, my role as the top guy was clearly being taken away. Remember, I am the guy that got total tops to bend for me. And usually it wasn't because we fought over the role. Most guys would see my dick and would just be on it.
Oh my goodness! It sounds as though I am bragging and an arrogant son of a bitch. But it is true. I would be the first to say it.
I don't have a huge dick. It is not majorly long. But it does have good reach and the biggest feature is the girth.
"So are you okay with that?"
"What? Me being a bottom?
"Yes."
"I don't have a problem but It is rare that I bottom. and I am pretty tight."
"Don't worry about that. I will take my time with you." He said.
As we were continuing our vetting, he said, "I want you to be my boy."
This was 2002. I was 31 years old. I was still very much in the closet.
Just one year ago I was a "good" church boy with a "dark" secret. The only thing I really knew about gay culture, and the varieties of sex is what I experienced cruising local parks, restrooms, behind bushes, hunting the gay bars, and the infamous sex phone line that got me laid plenty of times. None of those experiences mentioned anything about what the term "boy" means in the gay kink world. As a matter of fact I was so vanilla, that vanilla was nothing more than a flavor.
"Be your boy?"
"Yes. Do you know what that means?"
"What does that entail?"
"It is better if I show you. You can follow me back to my place. I can show you what it means to be my boy. At anytime you can leave if you don't like it."
We finished our drinks and went to his place.
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Sometime around 2:15am
We arrived at his place. As I was getting out of the car, he called out from his driveway, "Wait! Don't get out of the car yet ! Just hold on!"
I didn't think much of it, although it was peculiar why I couldn't follow him in his home yet.
Curiously I watched him unload what looked like a mattress out of the bed of his truck.
I can envision it like it was yesterday. It was an old blue Toyota truck. Some details are crystal clear while others I have to really reach for. This was way before I journaled my sexcapades. and way before I had my iPad. Hell, I don't think iPads were even thought of then.
"Maybe he just got off work and had to move the mattress?"
"Maybe he needs it for his bed?" I thought to myself.
He disappeared into the side of the house. After a few minutes, he opened the front door and waved me to come in.
As soon as I walked through the threshold
of his place he told me to turn facing the door, strip down to my underwear and get on my knees and wait for his instructions. He then went into another room while I stripped.
At first I didn't think much of it so I did as I was instructed. About a minute of being on my knees facing the wall, thoughts started to run through my mind.
"What if this guy is some kind of psycho?"
"What if this guy whacks me across the head while I got my back turned?"
"What the fuck did I get myself into?"
All of these thought started running through my head.
Just as I lost my nerves and decided to turn around and stand up, I heard footsteps coming into the living room. My heart raced like mad.
Before I had time to turn around he placed his hand on my shoulder.
"Turn around."
I turned and faced him.
He changed out of his blue jeans and was dressed in black jeans and a black t shirt.
"Remember when I told you I want you to be my boy?"
"Yeah," I responded.
"That is 'Yes Sir' to you," he responded sternly.
"Yes Sir."
"So this is what is to be my boy,"
"You are here for my pleasure and my pleasure only. When I say do something, you do it. If I want some ass, I'm going to fuck you. If I say,'Get on my dick,' that means give me head. You will not stop giving me head until I say so. Every time you come by, you will strip to your underwear face the door and get on your knees. Whenever you fuck up, you will be disciplined. We can go over your discipline options if there is an option that is too much for you," he declared.
I'm not sure how I responded to the info given. I believe I was pretty much,"whatever" about it. It did not really sink in at that time yet.
He went through a check list of things I like, dislike, will tolerate but not my favorite. One of the things I used to tolerate was oral.
Back in the day I wasn't as fond of oral as I am now. I thought sucking and getting sucked was somewhat boring. I was pretty much into fucking mostly. That is radically different now but when I was younger it was all about butt sex.
"Hands behind your back," he quietly commanded.
I placed my hands behind my back as he unbuttoned and unzipped his pants.
"Get on my dick."
I understood the assignment.
I was a little lost since he knew sucking wasn't my favorite. Then it dawned on me. This was not about my pleasure.
He had a nice size dick. It wasn't huge but it wasn't so small that one would be disappointed. The girth wasn't as wide which made it good for me to handle if he was going to take me anally. But my job right then and there was to take his cock in my mouth until he said enough.
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