SHOPPING

Some day this year or last. Hell! Pick a day.

 As I walk into the local grocery store, I walk in more as a voyeur than a shopper.  The volume of men, mainly White guys that wear gym shorts with no underwear is astounding.

The angle of the dangle, the hypnotic swing of the pendulum; It really is an incredible thing to witness.

There is no particular "type" of guy that catches my attention.

The Black produce guy with the shoulder length locs is quite appealing.  Hundreds of twisted locs obscures his face as he breaks down boxes.  Nice ass.  Round and very callipygian.  Thick in all the right places.  

"What does that face look like?  I know what that ass looks like!"

He takes a break to snap his neck back, sweeping the hair out of his face.  It is like it is happening in slow motion. 

Dark skin.  Round thick lips.  Did I mention thick ass? 

There's a good amount of Asian guys shopping today. 

Anyone else notice how much ass a lot of them have behind them?   

I'm like, "Damn!"

Something I notice about each demographic: (Yes I'm generalizing.)

The conversations that go through my mind while "shopping" are highly inappropriate and politically cancel worthy to many sensitive snow flakes.  These are my private thoughts when shopping.  Save your hate mail for when I really get real.

White guys don't wear drawls: (Where I'm from they are not drawers.) 

Fight me on this.

Asian dudes got ass. Plenty.

Black Dudes are almost like unicorns.  I don't know where we are hiding, I didn't get the memo but the one's I do get the opportunity to observe Ain't missing any meals.  Thick in so many places.  I am not mad at that either. 

Yes this is objectification at its finest. 

Gay, straight. Whether by themselves with their girl friend or spouse It doesn't matter.  Not when you are shopping for eye candy.

I did go to the store to buy something.

Irrelevant.